Clarissa's (Dis)Satisfaction with Life

In Mrs. Dalloway, the past and present play equally important roles in shaping the plot. Past events, portrayed through the lens of memories from various characters, serve as vital context which allows for deeper understanding of obscure facets of characters’ personalities. Every passage of the novel can be sorted into one of two categories: narration of an important character’s current actions or exploration of their memories. Clarissa Dalloway, being the protagonist, is the character whose past is displayed most thoroughly. As readers become privy to more and more of her thoughts, it becomes increasingly difficult to decipher her attitude towards her past and present state of being. Her opinion on one memory will seem to indicate deep regret of a decision, while in the next instant a different thought will suggest the complete opposite. Such ambivalence paints a complex portrait of Clarissa, making it challenging to categorize her overall view of the past as reminiscent or regretful. Thus, it also becomes difficult to definitively identify her attitude towards her current life circumstances. 

    Perhaps the most striking example of Clarissa’s complex perception of her own life circumstances are her feelings about her marriage. At the beginning of the book, it becomes clear that Clarissa is dissatisfied, if not entirely unhappy with the current state of her marriage. She explicitly describes the ways in which her relationship has fallen short, stating that her marriage to Richard lacks “something central which permeated; something warm which broke up surfaces and rippled the cold contact of man and woman, or women together” (Woolf 31). Although there is nothing inherently bad in the marriage, she resents the lovelessness and lack of warmth in their relationship. In the context of this discontentment, her tendency to dwell on her teenage years in Bourton – a period where she had multiple suitors – could be viewed as a regret of not choosing a different husband. Clarissa explicitly states that she is confident that she made the right decision by not marrying Peter – “she had been right… not to marry him” (Woolf 6). Despite this affirmation of her marriage, her mind frequently wanders back to Peter and she finds herself wondering if Peter would have allowed her to live a more adventurous life. Even if Clarissa’s criticism of Peter is taken entirely at face value, it is still possible that she wishes that she could have found a husband other than Richard or Peter – someone that she could have fostered a warm connection with. However, Clarissa’s entire marriage narrative becomes even more complicated once Richard’s point of view is introduced. Him and Clarissa are shown sharing an intimate, albeit awkward, lunch, suggesting that their marriage is perhaps not as far gone as Clarissa initially made it out to be.

Another element of Clarissa’s current identity that she displays ambivalence towards is her role as a traditional, upper-class house wife. Specifically, she seems to resent her role as a hostess for her husband’s high-society parties. Back in Bourton, she was distraught when Peter called her a “perfect hostess” because it diminished her identity and suggested that she was only capable of fulfilling traditional Victorian era female social roles. The label of perfect hostess still haunts her in the present because of the accuracy of the prediction. Near the end of the novel, when Clarissa holds her party, she feels self-conscious because Peter watches her perform the role of hostess. Such negative sentiments suggest that she would rather have married a different man with a less pretentious social class and fewer traditional gender role expectations. It could also indicate a desire to have remained unmarried to pursue an education. Resentment of the education of Ms. Killman and Lady Bruton both point towards a longing for a formal education. On the other hand, also Clarissa expresses positive views on her role as a hostess. In her mind, her parties are an “offering” – an opportunity to form connections and foster relationships. Clarissa recognizes that she is naturally suited for the role of hostess thanks to her affinity for creating interpersonal connections and her ability to facilitate the formation of relationships. In the final section of the novel, once she is convinced that the party is not a failure, she begins to truly enjoy the social aspects of the gathering.

Clarissa’s marriage and social status are but a few of the many ambiguous elements of her character, so it is impossible to definitively conclude her overall outlook on the outcome of her life from just these two aspects of her identity. Readers of this blog – please feel free to contribute other examples of Clarissa’s ambiguous self-perception or share what you think of her overall satisfaction with life.

Woolf, Virginia. Mrs. Dalloway. Harcourt, 2005.